Member-only story
A Common Dating Mistake
And how to avoid making it
When my husband and I divorced a little over 5 years ago, I went out on a lot of dates. Now that I am in a committed relationship, I don’t have my own stories to share about dating, but I have friends who call me up to share their experiences.
Even though I am personally pretty conservative, having been raised by Indian parents and being a Christian, I am non-judgmental. I have friends who tell me stuff because they know I won’t judge them and I will try to see their viewpoint. Of course, I do share my opinion — if someone is cheating I will point out that this is not ethical. So I’ll call them on things. Sometimes this makes them upset and I may lose the friendship. Other times, it gets them thinking and they appreciate my honesty.
And yes, cheating in a committed relationship is a mistake. Lying to someone to get them to go out with you is a mistake. But most people get this.
One thing they don’t get — that they have no right to “fix” another person.
I’ve seen this mistake over and over.
A person wants a relationship so badly that they decide to “settle”. They assume that they can always “improve” their partner once they are in a relationship.
Guess what?
