Member-only story
Asking For Space
I’m an introvert and that is OK
I was reading an article by a woman who wanted a quiet dinner and drink alone at a bar after a long day. A man sat next to her and proceeded to talk at her for the duration of what she had hoped would be a solitary time. She didn’t want to talk to him and he didn’t actually want a conversation. He wanted someone to listen to him monologing. He imposed on her without any concern for what she wanted or needed.
She didn’t have to put up with this.
I wouldn’t have.
In similar situations, I’ve pretended to be deaf. Or not to speak English. Both of those responses shuts down the interloper.
I’ve also just been honest.
One time I was on a plane. I was in the middle of a really good novel and I wanted to be left alone to read.
The guy next to me introduced himself. That was fine. He started to tell me where he was flying to and why. I smiled and nodded politely, and returned to my book. But he kept talking.
So I turned to him and said, “I’m trying to read my book. I don’t want to talk.”
He kept talking so I repeated this. The third time I said it, he pouted. Which was fine with me. Because pouting is silent.
