I have had some of the same issues. I hate how animals are treated in factory farms. I don’t have a problem with the cycle of life and death, but I don’t think innocent animals should be tortured.

So I was vegan for years, but started to have issues with my health. Fortunately I live in Texas and there are local farms where I can source pastured meats and eggs. I do still avoid dairy because of how calves are treated… though for a while I was able to get milk, butter and cheese from a local organic farm where the calves stayed with their moms until weaned. But the farm family, after 10 years, moved. Their kids had grown up and they wanted a change. So now I seldom drink milk.