If your mom is toxic, let her be. Do the basics but no more.

I don’t understand this attitude of some mothers towards daughters and I think it horribly affects women’s ability to make female friendships, which also makes me sad, because we need to support each other. It makes it harder for women to be in healthy relationships with men. And it makes it harder for them to trust themselves.

You need to heal and fix the holes in your own heart, you can’t feel guilty for doing that. Please care for yourself without feeling guilty.