Member-only story
I’ve forgiven my ex-husband
My mother hasn’t. I don’t think she ever will. And that’s OK.
Three and a half years ago, my husband left me.
Since then, he’s suggested several times coming back. I’ve told him no. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly hoping for a different result. I’m not insane. Why would I want to repeat a marriage that failed?
That being said, I’m friendly with him. Not intimate or close, but I’ll meet him for coffee or lunch once a month and enjoy it.
Part of this is because we share memories that I don’t share with anyone else.
While there were unhappy parts of our marriage, there were also some really great experiences we shared.
For example, we took a couple of amazing vacations with my parents. We went to Paris and to the Grand Canyon, as well as taking them all over Colorado. Since my father has passed away, these memories have become more poignant and precious to me. My ex is the one person, besides Mom, who remembers how Dad laughed when he won at cards or how much he loved to hold our cat Snoopy in his lap.
That’s another thing to reminisce about — our cat, Snoopy. She passed away a couple of years before we separated. She was 21 years old and we both loved her dearly. We can laugh…
