Member-only story
Mom Didn’t Want More Children
But her in-laws pressured her
Mom didn’t get married until she was 26 years old. That was considered really old for an Indian girl, but she didn’t really want to get married. She was happy with her life, and her parents weren’t inclined to push her.
However, her parents started to get pressured by Indian society. it was a father’s duty to make sure his daughter was married. He ignored them for a while, but then they hit him below the belt.
“Who will take care of your daughter after you are gone?” they asked him.
So he asked my mother if she could get married. But he also tried to give her a choice.
This was back in the 1960s, and Indian marriages at that time were arranged by the parents. Often the kids might not meet each other until the engagement ceremony. But my grandfather was different.
“I’ll pick a dozen or so boys,” he told her. “All of them from good families, with good reputation. And you can meet each one and choose the one you want.”
He was pretty confident any man would want his beautiful daughter because he never considered the possibility that one of the men would reject her.
She only met one man, however. After she met my father, she decided she wanted him.
