My perspective — EVERY single man I’ve been with (not very many, I was a virgin when I got engaged the first time) has cared about my pleasure. They will keep at it until I orgasm.

This is not to put anything negative on you though. I read what you wrote and started to feel sad for you, then stopped myself. Because you are an independent and mature person, you are happy with your life, and you are sharing your experiences with vulnerability and honesty. I appreciate that.

For myself, maybe I’ve been lucky. I don’t know. One thing I can tell you, when I went on dates, I never cared about pleasing the man. I figured he asked me out, it was his job to please me. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t get a second date.