Member-only story
Toshiba foils a plot to take over the world
The misadventures of an African Gray
Note: This story is set sometime in the ’80s. Queue up some Culture Club or Bowie, or “Get Into the Mood” with Madonna…
Part One: Commercials and Antacids
“Ms Stein!” yelled Percy Applebaum as he swallowed three white pills.
Lara Stein strode towards him, white Styrofoam cup extended. Percy took a swig. “Any sign of her?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No. We called her an hour ago. No answer.”
Percy groaned. He paced back and forth. Lara moved back a few steps and waited. She was a tall woman with dyed blond hair pulled into a chignon and shapely legs encased in suntan Leggs Sheer Energy hose.
“Why me?” muttered Percy, flinging up his hands. “My cousin Murray makes movies and lives it up in Maui. Me? I make commercials for trailer trash and deal with ditzy blonds living in houseboats! A houseboat! Ms. Stein, what kind of woman lives on a boat?”
Lara examined her cuticles. “The kind whose lipstick runs down the cracks in her face. Red lipstick, no less.”
“And she’s always late,” fumed Percy. “Jesus fucking Christ! I don’t know why I work with her! It was that damn commercial! I…
