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What Is Love?
And what is necessary for a healthy relationship?
The other day I had a wonderful conversation with a friend. We were discussing — what is friendship? And what is love?
Because many people, particularly those who grew up in traumatic situations, may not be sure what love actually is, and what a friendship is.
Generational Trauma
Even people who grow up in functional families experience some dysfunction or trauma. It’s the nature of the beast — people are hurting, so they hurt others. This includes parents and other relatives.
It’s not that the parents don’t love their children. But if they were abused as children, then they may not know any way to express their feelings that do not cause pain.
For example, some people associate love with possession. Others associate it with drama. These people might “test” their loved ones by doing something to see what kind of response they get.
If their partner responds respectfully, then the tester might feel disappointed because they associate love with actions that I consider emotionally abusive.
It’s not just partnerships
This kind of thing manifests itself in all types of relationships — we bring our emotional…
