what kind of monster makes fun of you or puts you down? Look, to be honest, I only read your stuff every once in a while because it's not generally my cup of tea but that's just a matter of taste. It has no bearing on your value as a person. And obviously you enrich the lives of many people or they wouldn't follow you. I think it's great that you speak up honestly - the world has too many people who put on an act or play games. At least you are real. I am very sorry you are going through such a rough patch and I wish you the best going forward.