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Women, own your happiness
Don’t expect men to provide it
I love The Color Purple. I love how Celie, after years of abuse and pain, finds her joy. Her happiness comes when she takes control of her own life. But hers is not the only story of redemption and joy in that movie.
Alice Walker is a genius who wrote an intensely spiritual novel. Whether or not you’re a Christian or even believe in God, it has a message that resonates and lessons it teaches.
We say we don’t need men to make us happy. And we don’t. But do we mean it when we say it? Do we act like it?
How often do women stay in miserable relationships, and then complain that their mates aren’t making them happy. Of course the onus is on the man.
That’s not the way it works.
You’re responsible for your own happiness. Period.
I’m saying this as someone who was married to an alcoholic for years.
I loved that man, and I saw the problems his disease caused. And yes, it’s a disease. I don’t blame him for his addictions. I can blame him for the times he actively hurt me, but when he drank, he didn’t do it to cause me pain. He did it to numb his own pain. And that’s not something I will judge.